Sugar Grove
By Paula Mitchell
The writer thought the readers would greatly enjoy “The Month after Christmas” poem written anonymously. It is quite apropos in this neck of the woods.
“‘Twas the month after Christmas,
And all through the house
Nothing would fit me, not even a blouse.
The cookies I’d nibbled, the eggnog I’d taste
At the holiday parties had gone to my waist.
When I got on the scales there arose such a number!
When I walked in the store (less a walk than a number),
I’d remember the marvelous meals I’d prepared:
The gravies and sauces and beef nicely rared,
The wine and the rum balls, the bread and cheese
And the way I’d never said, ‘No thank you, please.’
As I dressed myself in my husband’s old shirt
And prepared once again to do battle with dirt —
I said to myself, as I only can,
‘You can’t spend a winter disguised as a man!’
So — away with the last of the sour cream dip,
Get rid of the fruit cake, every cracker and chip.
Every last bit of food that I like must be banished
‘Til all the additional ounces have vanished.
I won’t have a cookie — not even a lick.
I’ll want only to chew on a long celery stick.
I won’t have hot biscuits, or corn bread, or pie;
I’ll munch on a carrot and quietly cry.
I’m hungry, I’m lonesome, and life is a bore —
But isn’t that what January is for?
Unable to giggle, no longer a riot,
Happy New Year to all, and to all a good diet.”
Life’s little lessons include the following:
- Leave everything better than one found it.
- Learn to show cheerfulness, even when a person doesn’t feel like it.
- Hold doors open for strangers
- Let people cut in front of a person in traffic.
- Keep babies entertained in grocery lines
Winter has sent its blast to this neck of the woods. Reportedly 6 to 8 inches fell with an added mixture of ice last weekend. Temperatures have dipped into the single digits with Friday morning recording a -5° at the writer’s home, and -7° in other parts of the community. More snow is predicted. Students returned to school Friday, after a three-hour delay. That marked the end of the long Christmas vacation!
Quotes for the week are as follows:
“Life will reward you, but not always by the route you expect.” — Edna Rodriguez
“Through the chill of December the early winter moans, but it’s that January wind that rattles old bones.” — John Facenda
“May the light illuminate your hearts and shine in your life every day of the year.” — Eileen Anglin
“It costs $0.00 to be a decent human being.” — Anonymous
“The more I think about it, I realize there is nothing more artistic than to love others.” — Vincent van Gogh
This week’s clickety-clacks for the chin waggers are as follows:
- Slugs have four noses.
- Feline’s jaws cannot move sideways.
- Western Australia is three and a half times as big as Texas.
- The ancient Egyptians invented the 365-days a year calendar to predict the yearly floodings of the Nile River.
- There is alleged to be a 30-to-40 foot long “monster” in Lake Erie named Bessie. The earliest recorded sighting goes back as early as 1793.
Definitely sitting by the fireplace is the best place to hear the “Talk of The Grove.”
Recent visitors in the home of Willard and Judy Rader were Bob and Martha Fisher of Romney, Kevin and Malintha Custer of Staunton, Virginia, and Joel and Betsy Farrar of Lynchburg, Virginia.
Evelyn Varner is recuperating at home following a hospital stay last weekend.
Helen Nash enjoyed a recent birthday celebration. Although a planned lunch outing had to be postponed, the day was festive, complete with cards, phone calls, balloons, flowers, gifts, cake, and an overnight visit from Todd and Cathy Nash of Rhoadesville, Virginia.
Sorry to hear that Jim Moats is feeling under the weather. Hoping for him to bounce back soon!
The January Wolf Moon was thus called due to the pack of wolves heard howling at the moon outside Indian villages long ago.
How about this joke? (Thanks to Doris Hoops) “I fell asleep in church, then I heard ‘Stand Up’ so I stood up and people clapped. The pastor asked, ‘Who else will give $2,000?’”
Some more January birthdays include Wayne Price, 18th; Andy Hott Collins, 19th; Cary Hevener and Zion Brubeck, 20th; Catherine Eye, 21st; Jackie Smith and John Dorsey, 22nd; Charles Kiser, 24th; Myra Mitchell and Scott Rightsell, 25th; Violet Eye and Sue Ann Sites, 26th; Marion Williams and Brandon Simmons, 27th; Jamie Hoover, 28th; Nancy Pitsenbarger, 30th; and Jamie Watson, 31st.
Concerns are for the following: Bob Adamson, Dyer Anderson, John Ashley, Roger Ashley, Mercedes Aumann, “Bo” Boggs, Marie Cole, Stanley Dahmer, the Benny Evick family, Isaac Eye, Linda Eye, Marie Eye, Mary Eye, Carl Gant, David Gillespie, Lola Graham, Patsy Green, JC Hammer, Marvin Hartman, Steve and Armanda Heavner, Donald Hedrick, Jack and Starr Hedrick, George Hevener, Jim Hiner, Evan Hise, Tim Hively, Edsel and Mary Ann Hogan, Virgil Homan, Jr., Keith Hoover, Myrtle Hoover, Tim L. Hoover, Debbie and Enos Horst, Alice Johnson, Richard Judy, Marsha Keller, Kim Kline, Tracie Knight, Laura Kropp, Melissa Lambert, O’Dell Lambert, Robert Lambert, Rex Landis, Roger and Skip Mallow, Audree Marie, Yvonne Marsh, Ed May, Gene and Joan McConnell, Gary McDonald, Neil McLaughlin, Rose Miller, Bruce Minor, Barbara Moats, Gloria Moats, John Morford, Bill Mullenax, Helen Nash, Aaron Nelson, Angie Nelson, Ruth Nelson, Cheryl Paine, Terri Parker, Diane Pennybaker, Andy Pond, Janice Propst, Eldon “Butch” Puffenbarger, Alda Propst, Janis Propst, Marilyn Propst, Mike Propst, Sheldon Propst, the Greta Rader family, Tom Rader, Brandon Reel, Jason Rexrode, Linda Fay Rexrode, Dennis Riggleman, Donna Ruddle, Jenny Ruddle, Mary Sawyers, Brittany Shriver, Annie Simmons, Erin Simmons, Eva Simmons, the Geneva Simmons family, Greg Simmons, Judy Simmons, Nelson Simmons, Robbie Sites, Mike Skiles, Tina Stuben, Steve Stump, Linda and Larry Vandevander, Sandra Vandevander, Amy Vaus, the family of Donna Wagoner, Estelle Wagner, Mary Louise Waldschlager, Rene White, Sherry Wilfong, Judy Williams, Ann and Ed Wimer, New Orleans victims, and individuals and families who continue to be affected and displaced by the fires in California.